so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Randomize
