So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
