I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Randomize