he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
he had hair everywhere except his balls
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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