I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
