ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
