so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
i think i have herpe
just one?
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
sex in a hospital.. check
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize
