Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Randomize
