Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
