i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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