Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize