shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
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