She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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