the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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