Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
It was confusing and full of hummus
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
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