I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Randomize
