Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
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