I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize