The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
