ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
