I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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