I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Do vagina's smell?
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Randomize
