He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
