Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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