Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
