it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
