did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
