can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
if only i could text you this smell
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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