is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
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