I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I need a beard to bite.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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