The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
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