Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
