Someone shit on the floor
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
