ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Randomize
