dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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