that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Randomize
