i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I need a beard to bite.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
