I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
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