I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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