nut hugger
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
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