i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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