erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
