No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
