I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
