i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Randomize