you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize