DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
