matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
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