Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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