it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
