HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Randomize